Wednesday, March 18, 2015
Obsessive thoughts about race and racism
I spent a part of the afternoon trying to ignore thoughts and dealing with the thoughts about racism. I am obsessed, not fixated, but obsessed with race, and it shows on my posts. I am a person who does indeed have strong views about race and racism. How much does it tie into classism? Who is the racist here? Am I the racist? I don't think I myself am a racist but I realize that I choose to embrace the fact that I am not a racist, nor do I believe that I have racist tendencies. I hope that I don't. I believe that it all started with doing a genealogical search years back. I found some interesting information about my family history and I didn't realize that that could have stopped it. Then there was something I was watching on a talk show and they were talking about race and then I realize something then. I had bothersome thoughts about racism even then. I have had those thoughts for years. I wonder about that. I know it exists and sadly it is alive and well. I don't think it will end until Jesus comes back. I wish that we could all love and respect one another by the content of their character. A lot my forum posts are about race and it hit me. I have others that I wish to address, like politics, gardening, sports, and even know about money and cars. I know that there is more to all of us, myself included, than the color of my skin. I don't know or think that race should be a way to define who we all are whether it be talent or intelligence. We are all humans with some talent and some intelligence. I have wondered why I have thoughts about race and racism. Just like the infidelity thoughts about infidelity, I choose to not be anxious. I choose to embrace it. I know I am not a racist.