I am no longer afraid of watching infidelity committed by wives in movies. I always knew it was fictional, but I had to see things for myself. I spend a lot of time engaging in compulsions. I can't take it anymore. I hate doing it, but I cannot stop them. I have a good counselor but even in those times those are annoying. I often feel bad about having obsessive thoughts and performing compulsions. I feel like I am unable to stop. I just cannot take it anymore.