Monday, November 9, 2015

In need of Wisdom

I need You always, Wisdom.  I have got to let this guy go.  In fact, I have got to let the world actually pass me by.  It may be easier for those thoughts to pass me by as well.  I have gone tired of fighting, which is one of the ironies of having OCD.  Maybe I should just relax.  I don't know what more to do. I am tired of the worse case scenarios for instance.  The thoughts focus on them all the time realizing that they could happen.  Truth is stranger than fiction has become one of my least favorite quotes because of this worse case scenario.    Being mindful and struggling to let the thoughts pass is a lot of work.  OCD is really a lot of work and a lot to deal with.  However, I have come to realize that there must have been a reason to struggle the way I have been.  Well, it did draw me closer to the Lord, that is for sure.  I am thankful for the OCD and I am thankful for knowing this guy who I liked. Lord, may he rest in peace.

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