As far as the obsessive thoughts, I have made some progress. Progress however, have been slow. Progress is well worth it. However, I felt as it I have convicted to do more for myself. I feel so alone sometimes. It is time for me to lay off the internet for a while. That might do me some good. I realize that I have to let go of what I feel is quite secure. On the other hand, it has only been a few years. I have realized that I have allowed the world to pass me by. I am always one who writes, writes, and continually writes. What do I want? What person do I want to be? Well, I would like to be able to live life. I have to be honest with myself, even more than now. I need to not only be convicted but to follow those convictions. I have come to realize that I succeed by doing what is hardest to me. I have learned to not allow those thoughts to take over. It was a long fight that I am winning. I feel trapped, even at home. How do I overcome this? I need a support system starting from You. I have prayed about this often. I believe that God wants me to take action, no matter how difficult or how scary. All I have to do is to follow His leading and take some action. I have to do this.