Tuesday, May 23, 2017

Selected posts 4/25-5/23

Simple advice

There is nothing in the world like taking simple advice seriously.  I have realized that in the past that is all I have done.  I have worried about the present more so because I stayed stuck in the past.  I am this and that and the other.  The problem was not really who I am, but I was stuck tn my past.  I am no longer in my 20s and 30s.  Now that I am in my 40s, I have grown older and wiser.  I have learned that as a person in my early 40s, I am young enough, but I am not so young that I cannot learn from the mistakes I have made in the past, not even the more recent past.  All I have is the present moment and plans to make about the rest of my life.  If my current path doesn't pan out, then be thankful for the moment and learn from it.  I have learned that that is all I can do.

"Getting outside of myself"..

I have a confession to make.  I have a crush on a guy.  I have wondered if I were too old to have a crush on a guy.  I am over 40 and I wish to be married someday.  I thought I was a grown up and as far as a number, I am.  However, there is a part of me that is still childish and self absorbed.  I tend to be a selfish person at times.  I often pray more for myself than I do for other people.  That is just so sad.  I am a Christian.  How can I be so self absorbed?  My real guess is that I have great difficulty praying for other people.  I am always in a hurry to leave.  I lack patience since it is not one of my virtues.  I want to learn and grow and finally grow up.  I have become too concerned with my own life and wrapped up in my own problems.  Ironically, I am writing about myself in this blog right now.  Not only is it time for me to stop being so self absorbed but to start seeing myself and the world for what it truly is and see people for who they truly are.  I have formed opinions based on romantic notions or on what I have heard.  Sadly I have realized that after all of these years that it is no way to live.

My life in my 40s

It has obviously been a while since I have blogged any entries.  Sometimes there comes a time in a person's life when one has to bite the bullet.  This is my moment of biting the bullet and create a few blog entries. I have just been exhausted mentally and just stopped caring.  I don't know if it has gotten mundane or something else.  I have been this way for a while now.  It has been a long while.  I have gotten older and wiser, but the truth is, I cannot change the past and there are things that I wish to have back.  What I'm saying is while I wish that I would have the drive and energy I once had, I don't want to go back to that nor do I wish to be less wise than I am now.  I finally realize that I am typing this, I finally realize what it means to, while I am still young, my youth is gone.  I am at an age where with age, comes wisdom and a greater confidence than I have ever known.  I want to be more committed to my goals and start caring again.  I am at an age where I have the best of all worlds.

Personal interpretation of Deuteronomy 12:1-4

  1“These are the statutes and the judgments which you shall carefully observe in the land which the LORD, the God of your fathers, has given you to possess as long as you live on the earth. 2“You shall utterly destroy all the places where the nations whom you shall dispossess serve their gods, on the high mountains and on the hills and under every green tree. 3“You shall tear down their altars and smash their sacred pillars and burn their Asherim with fire, and you shall cut down the engraved images of their gods and obliterate their name from that place. 4“You shall not act like this toward the LORD your God."

I have not only shown respect to the Lord by the way I was acting.  I didn't realize that idolatry was a sin that I have committed.  I have since repented of that sin.  I didn't realize that allowing myself to be caught up in the things of the world would constitute idolatry, but it doesn't.  Not spending enough time could be an example of idolatry.  I am very guilty of that form of idolatry.  My time like other idolaters has not been spent on the Lord, but on whoever or whatever is in the world.  That whoever and whatever was a high place that needed to be broken down.  The altars wasn't' in my house but in my mind.  That was not about anxiety, so I won't use that as an excuse.  It was about a choice that I made, which did in turn, cause even greater anxiety.  The Lord wants the divided attention of all of us, no matter where we are at.  My hope is that I am not misinterpreting the Word of God.  Being sacred is about being of God, not of the world.  I have not kept some things sacred and I have since repented of this.  I take full responsibility of my sins.  This I am writing because the Lord is Jealous and wants not just our worship, but our undivided attention. 

Jealousy and True Love

Psalm 31:23

"Love the LORD, all his faithful people! The LORD preserves those who are true to him, but the proud he pays back in full."

Love is something that is not jealous.  Furthermore, jealousy is about fear and about coveting.  I guess.  I am trying to be wise.  Furthermore, I am trying to be right about the interpretation of God's Word.  One of the worst thing anyone can do is to misinterpret scripture.  That I believe is why false prophets and false teachers are flourishing in the planet.  They deceive the flock by twisting the Word of God for often times financial gain.  Where is the love in deception, much less jealousy?  The only jealousy that is not about fear and coveting is about the Jealousy of God.  We are to not just be true, but to love God with all of our hearts, souls, minds, and strengths.  All of it.  God is a Jealous God who wants us to divide all of our attentions to Him.  After all, Jesus paid all of His attention to us. That is what I finally realize today.  We as Christians are to be Jealous for the Lord, because He is Jealous towards us.  That is what true love is all about.

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